Seriously let cut the intro crap… much have happened for the past week. Besides me falling some of my minor tests…2 actually…and huge pile of assignments, a lot of things happened. Bro and SY are finally official. 0.0 Who would have thought that the girl I intro him really end up as his gf ? Seriously! And he started going to Sunday service and youth with me is just unbelievable wakakaka.
Anyway I did talk with auntie about those love birds. Though auntie is ok with bro and SY but she did fire me indirectly…=.= for helping them. Well that’s that, you don’t expect Eric’s best friend to stop them from becoming couples do you?
Auntie also told me not to put so much hope into friendship… Don’t be such a fool and naive by over-helping your friends. They are not your family members. She is not the only one that said this phrase. I’ve already heard this phrase for like…10 times from 10 diff person this week…? How can I not be shaken…? As much as I hate to admit it, there is no way that what those 10 people said 0was wrong and what I said was right. So what do you want me to do? Be a good friend but, yet, don’t put so much hope unto him. Wow…that is quite contradicting isn’t it?
Told her that nowadays bro seems to busy…he stopped replying sms-es…etc Auntie told me that Eric has moved on. He has his own life now. He has a gf now. Things will change. Soon things will change and he will have a family. He will have no more time for you…childhood friend or not. So it is better for me to let go of the friendship than to still cling so tightly unto it. Because if the tighter you cling unto it, the more you will strain the friendship. I know that this day will come, but still it hurts…
Personally, I think a relationship with a true friend brings more tears into the eyes than a love relationship. After the talk, I sms-ed bro, told him everything will be alright, between him and SY. But I was much shaken in return…bro called and asked me what auntie said. I was reluctant at first, but after much persuasion by bro I told him. After telling him what auntie thought of him and SY, he asked why I was angry / sad. I harden my heart and said that it was ok and I don’t want to talk about it. At that time I was thinking of walking out of the friendship. Maybe it would be better for him. He always tries to find time for me even when he is busy…and it makes me feel guilty.
And due to the recent argument with him, I thought he would forget about my problems, since he already done his job in asking what auntie thought of him. He sends me and sms and says he is sorry for the trouble he caused me. I smiled slightly; telling myself what he is doing is what every normal person would have done…to thank a person for a job well done. I didn’t reply…thinking that he probably doesn’t mean what he said. Few minutes later, he sends me same message again, apologizing again. My heart softens and I told him my problems and how I feel.
I did hint that I want to give up on the friendship…because it hurts too much and it is not worth it. He did try to tell me what I am doing now is not foolish because I am helping a good friend. He told me to do what is right. I asked whether he is angry of me…and he told me that I did nothing wrong…and just do what is right. Seriously, he gave me a imba answer…leaving me quite unsure, but if he were to say things like “you like lar” , “up to you” , “0.0” or “=O” I would have gave up on him. From his sms-es…I can see that he values the friendship. After much thought I told bro that I didn’t do anything wrong in helping him all this while. I would have done the same even if given the 2nd chance and he would have done the same for me if I am in his shoes. He was happy and I was happy. It ended well. Lolz.
In conclusion, I would keep what auntie said as advice…for now…I would just want to cherish all the time I would have with my big bro before he walk out of my sight completely. I guest I would have to reach the point where I will knock my head on the wall to really learn this bitter-sweet lesson.
I wonder how much longer we can continue walking hand in hand...
Gosh ! What were you thinking ? =x
